Lies We Tell Ourselves by Robin Talley
Release Date: September 30, 2014
Publisher: Harlequin Teen
Genre: Young Adult Contemporary, Historical Fiction, LGBT, African American
ISBN: 978-0373211333
Source: BEA 2014 ARC
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In 1959 Virginia, the lives of two girls on opposite sides of the battle for civil rights will be changed forever.

Sarah Dunbar is one of the first black students to attend the previously all-white Jefferson High School. An honors student at her old school, she is put into remedial classes, spit on and tormented daily.

Linda Hairston is the daughter of one of the town’s most vocal opponents of school integration. She has been taught all her life that the races should be kept “separate but equal.”

Forced to work together on a school project, Sarah and Linda must confront harsh truths about race, power and how they really feel about one another.

Boldly realistic and emotionally compelling, Lies We Tell Ourselves is a brave and stunning novel about finding truth amid the lies, and finding your voice even when others are determined to silence it.

Lies We Tell Ourselves. Where do I begin? Everything about this book is perfect. The cover. The title. The switching back and forth between the POV of Sarah, one of the first ten black students to enter an all white school in 1959 Virginia and Linda, one of the white students that Sarah encounters. The lies and later truths that open each chapter. The turmoil eating away at each and every character. Every raw emotion. Every physical altercation. Every single line of this book is hard hitting. It’s tough, it’s no holds barred. It challenges ignorance. Hatred. The matters of the heart. It’s so fluid and rich in character, in setting, in history. Lies We Tell Ourselves is worth every minute of your time.

It’s so bizarre knowing that my grandparents and those before them went to all black grade schools and my mother’s generation was the first to go to school after Brown vs. Board. In between that time period, there was the beginning of integration in public schools and getting to see what that part of history was like through this work of historical fiction was beyond fascinating. It was so captivating. Infuriating. Dispiriting. We’ve come a long way since then and knowing that there has been so much progression… that’s why I was able to finish this book because this is a tough subject matter of a book to get through. The first half of this book is ugly and hard to get through period but as a black woman, knowing that being on a certain side of this history is part of my history, it’s just a lot to take in without building hatred and resentment for the other side.

Being coached all summer long how to act before entering the all white school, Jefferson High. Don’t cry. You have to look strong. Don’t join any extracurricular activities either. Having rules engrained in their heads like sit in the front of the classroom, near the door for a quick getaway and stay together whenever possible for their own safety in a school setting with adults all around that are clearly no help whatsoever! Nor does the majority of the teachers make these kids feel welcome. But then, the town police are the exact same way. Their shiny badges are all that’s stopping them from yelling with the other white people. Having a cup thrown in the trash when a white person assumes a black person has touched it. My God. This was a scary time. And Robin Talley did her homework. From the major aspects to the small. Both as a black person experiencing racism and simply as a black person. I mean, I don’t think I’ve ever read a book by anyone who’s not black that mentions hot combs. Anyway…

It’s strange seeing someone else’s fears and ignorance bubble up, rise, and run over in such a contained environment and all of that negativity being directed towards what could have easily been me (and still could easily be me). This fear… this fear of the unknown. Of letting everybody be truly free. Of potential competition. Of letting go of some control. Of being wrong. This ignorance… ignorance is selfish. It blames others for one’s suffering when they are the ones responsible for the suffering. It twists the bible to fit its own limited point of view so people can continue to live however they want rather in the greatest commandment of all…love. Fear and ignorance together… look what can happen? Watching this come to life on the page and knowing how hard this time was for my people, it makes me sick. Thankfully, there are redeeming qualities for some of the characters that we’re following on the wrong side of history and watching that journey… that brought back the peace and hope that was oh so difficult to hold onto in the thick of it all.

Watching Sarah, a senior, watch out for her freshman sister, Ruth in a school where they were both such equally huge targets. Watching Sarah grow closer to the students who were once her acquaintances at her old high school but are now one of the first ten black students at an all white school alongside her. Watching Sarah and her white classmate, Judy’s friendship be what it was naturally. Watching Sarah and Linda’s relationship grow. The love and grace and hope that Sarah had and gave when all that was given to her was hatred… Sarah is such a beacon of light and that was so important to see and to hold onto.

Watching Linda when she thinks she deserves a reward for standing up for Ruth against a gang of rowdy white boys at school… also known as being a good person. Watching Linda as her position begins to change and that’s shared slowly over time through the school newspaper which at one point gets misunderstood and at another gets a false apology on her behalf because she couldn’t possibly have meant what she said. Watching Linda fall in love with Sarah at a time when that wasn’t even an option, fall in love with love and for a second, mention shame.

Watching Sarah and Linda push past fear and discover what love – unconditional love is together. Watching these two take giant steps out in faith… words can’t begin to describe how beautiful and inspiring that was. That is.

Love was so important, is so important to hold onto and the grace that came with it… absolutely mind blowing. These ten black students were chosen to integrate because they were smart only to find out that they’ve all been placed in remedial classes. Simply because of the color of their skin. White people called black people everything negative back then. It’s not just nigger, nigra, coon, etc… Also. For wanting to be treated equally aka like any decent human being… Uppity. Agitator. And children learn from their parents, so the white students loved to called the black students agitators too, completely dismissing or blind of the irony of the situation as they agitated every single moment and were looking for trouble with the black students, were looking for a reason to kill. Kill their dignity. Kill their spirit. Kill them.

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t think to myself in the first chapter, “Okay, ten black people are entering the all white school. Let’s see how many make it out alive at the end.” Most white people didn’t see a black person with hopes and dreams and ambitions and worth. It’s one thing to be misunderstood. It’s another thing to not be seen as worth being (understood) in the first place. Sarah and her friends woke up everyday and went to that school hoping they’d survive the day. At school! This stuff really happened! It’s one thing to feel like no one is on your side but to know it and have it in your face every single day. What an accurate portrayal of the times.

Lies We Tell Ourselves explores so, so many aspects of racism at this time and has done such a marvelous job bringing both sides, bringing empathy to life. This book broke my heart all over again. As a black woman, it never ceases to amaze me what the people before me went through for me to be in the position that I’m in today. But there’s still brokenness and hurting today and this book ends as another stage of this progression is just about to begin and I love how real even that ending is. There is no ending in sight for racism but watching this part of history as so many mindsets were evolving and opening up as so many blinders were taken off people’s eyes… what a fascinating time, groundbreaking in history. What a time well worth reading. Robin Talley is such a talented writer and has shared with the world such an important, beautiful book. A book I think everyone should read. So don’t wait. Pre-order this book right now!

Lies We Tell Ourselves by Robin Talley releases September 30, 2014.